past, present, and future

I started this week feeling refreshed. I had just spent the week working at a book stall at the Spring Harvest event in Minehead. Minehead is this adorable English coastal town in Somerset. The work was long and intense, but it did make me realise if I fail at whatever career option I pursue, at least I can always be happy working at Borders!
Last week I got to work with amazing people, had substantial exposure to new and wonderful books, and got to see the coast and the ocean. I have in a mystical way always had this incredible bond with water; and after being sick for a month straight, I finally started to feel more like myself. Being able to walk along the beach was the perfect way to mend me and bring me back to normal. When I returned to the YMCA I was ready to start working again, and enjoy my last few months at the Y. I had no idea what was in store for me in the coming week, bringing up the past, colliding with the present and transforming the future. Life changes were about to occur again for some American university students forever.

Anyone reading this blog will know of the events that happened at Virginia Tech, the awful tragedy that will be carried in memories for a very long time. The numerous questions, of how could this happen, and why? And what could have been done to prevent it? As I write today I send not only sympathy to those who lost loved ones, but also express my empathy. As I write today, I want to share my deep condolences, but also unleash some of my own past painful memories and sort out the mixed up emotions floating around in my head.

The Past

Five years ago, I lost two friends, both on my college campus at Catawba College, one to a dorm fire and one to a needless shooting. These incidents happened three months apart, and by the end of that school year Catawba College lost four students. A college that had a student population of 1,200 felt each loss deeply. In those days we were probably thinking very similar thoughts, to what Virginia Tech must currently be thinking. Being 19 years old at the time, and never having lost anyone close to me before, losing two friends was something I didn't know how to cope with. To complicate matters even further, I was a student leader (class president for the Sophomore Class), I felt like I had to some how balance my need to cry with putting on a strong face. I remember the first vigil we held for Andrew and looking out into a sea of faces, and doing everything I could to say a prayer without shedding tears. Why couldn't Andrew get out of that dorm? why did the fire start? Then three months later when gun fire opened at a campus party, a party which was supposed to have gone down in college history as the party of the year (which it did, but for very different reasons), D-Mo lost his life over an argument about an American football game. Who brings guns to a college party? Go figure.

The Present

I was on the phone with my father, when he broke the news about VT to me. The reporter said a shooting had broken out on the campus of Virginia Tech. My father had been watching the news, and he exclaimed "you can hear the gun shots, what is going on down there?". I immediately turned on the news, to see what on earth was happening. As a chill set in my bones, all I could think of was how scary this must be for the students, faculty, and staff. The memories of 2001-2002 came flooding back to me. I had this strong need to reach out in some form to the Virginia Tech community. I also thought of the friends from Catawba, some I have kept in touch with while in the UK, some I definitely needed to reach out to. So that's what I did. I had a chat with Erin, and we both expressed how awful it was, and how we couldn't sit still thinking about our own past experience. And then an idea took shape, a way for Catawba to reach out to VT much like colleges did for us when we were going through a similar situation but in a much smaller scale. So past and present SGA (Student Government Association) members banned together to offer VT support.

The Future

Watching the news from the United Kingdom, was an interesting experience. While many Americans, were dealing with grief, and trying to understand how a safe place like a university campus can erupt with mass killings; the news here was slightly different. Yes they were reporting the loss of life and the unfortunate tragedy, but they were also looking at gun control issues in the USA. Comments were flying on the airwaves about the lack of gun control the United States has, and how they/we are known for gun violence. While these comments are true, I found them hard to hear, and also the wrong time to hear them. I am a strong supporter of gun control, and love the idea of living in a country such as the United Kingdom which has a ban on handguns. With that said, I am still from a country that has a Constitutional amendment which gives us the right to bear arms. So where does that leave us? As we move forward these are questions the United States is going to be forced to answer. However, I do feel it is unfair for some of these media outlets to lose the humanistic side to this tragedy, and point out yet another flaw the USA has. Now is a time for grieving and healing.

The memories of the incidents in 2001-2002 at my college are never lost to me, but time has certainly helped to heal and for all that has helped me become a stronger and more compassionate individual. In the days and weeks to come, I’m certain that the bond throughout Virginia Tech’s community, as did the bond at our college in 2002, will strengthen and never be broken. As Virginia Tech begins to move forward and recover, remembering those lost, is a reminder of how precious life is and that we have yet another opportunity to devote each day to commemorating our friends and all who were lost by living our lives well. Cheers!

Today we are all Hokies!

Finally! Fair Trade comes to the YMCA

Can you be fair trader and sell a Nestle product?

Fair Trade producers pay the growers a living wage and seek to improve their working and living conditions, including shelter, medical needs, education. To buy anything less is like enjoying a cup of bloody "java". Nestle on the other hand is known for their poor labor practices.

So I started complainging, even if I accomplished nothing else. Finally, along with the help of our Chaplain Evan, have convinced the YMCA that this should be a Fair Trade facility. The YMCA practices Christian values and tries to uphold the marginalized people. So fair trading seems natural. The YMCA has this friendly little cafe that serves the community of West Bromwich, they offer coffee, tea, hot meals, treats, and pretty much all the things you would go to a cafe for.

When I first arrived I was very excited to see that they had fair trade sugar. Then discovered, to my surprise, that the fair trade sugar was going into Nescafe coffee! Now what sense does that make? It completely negates the point. How could anyone, who would listen, excersie fair trade, and still support Nescafe coffe? True its a bit more expensive BUT so worth it for the people behind the growing and producing of coffee! Maybe the cafe did not know. Well finally six months later....we were heard, when it wasn't only me the "righteous" and zealous American, but also our new Chaplain Evan saying we really should be serving fair trade products in the cafe.

So, now the cafe will begin serving fair trade coffee and tea and over the next few months serving all fair trade products. Who knows, cocoa, chocolate, and more. A small step for the YMCA cafe but another giant step for the growers and fair traders. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No more blood in our coffee ;-)

Peace, latte and cheers!
Monisha

In the end fate always wins!

Fate, its such a mysterious thing. I am a very strong believer in fate, even more so after having actually taken an amazing course on Fate in grad school. I can't help pondering about my fate. I have come to yet another cross roads in my life, and I wonder is this the fork in the road where I choose between my predestined path and exercise my free will? Or is this my fate, and no matter what I choose that is what fate has in store for me and at the end of the day do I really have a choice in the matter at all? Hmmm.

I have started dedicating a lot of time in my daily routine to taking steps in planning my future. What will I do next on this journey? My year in England is only half way over, yet I feel like I have to make some decisions now about what I will do next, and very very soon. And all these questions are running endlessly through my head. Where do I want to live? What do I want to do? Does this mean setting down roots finally or is this me still just free floating around the world? Is it ok for me not to set down roots? Is it ok to float with wanderlust? The mystery and possibilities question. Should I be considering settling down, meeting a man, getting married? Aggggggghhhhhhhhhh! It is enough to make my head explode. And I keep thinking why am I putting myself through this now? After all I am only 24 years young, yet with the big 25 (quarter of a century, which my lovely friend Amanda keeps reminding me) looming nearer and nearer, I can't help but wonder, what does fate have in store for me...... Could this be a reminder that patiennce and trust is needed right now? Everything I do and have done is getting me closer to the inevitable next steps.

It is difficult to remember I am but a passenger and surely not driving this bus!

All I know is fate always wins in the end!

Peace and cheers!
Monisha

6 months/ 200 days aboard!

Yup I am alive, well and still in the UK. Phew, I know some people had started to worry, or worse people have waited so long for me to post another blog that they just gave up on me. That's OK, like many things in this world this too can be amended, and having patience is sometimes very important. So I have finally made it to the six month point, and must say it feels a bit strange. A lot can happen in six months, for that matter in a day. One's whole world could change in a matter of minutes, ask victims of hurricanes, war, death and disasters. I must say that I am happy I made it to this threshold without major crises. The question is were there any doubts in my mind? Of course!

The past few months that I have been away from my lovely blog entries, have been difficult ones. I started to feel the pressure of what am I going to do next after this year is over with. I received some news from home that my father was facing some serious health issues though the prognosis was good; I began to feel lonelier than I had in months. My work at the YMCA was starting to...hmm in polite words, not stretch me as much as I would like. To be fair, however, all things weren't bad. I did get make a trip home to see my father (I do not recommend this unless its an emergency, going home and coming back was way harder than I could have ever imagined, but I will get into that another time). Another friend from home came to visit, and I have continued to learn, and adapt to my life in England. Oh, and did I mention I got to go to Morocco and Milan on quick little jaunts. Not bad huh? :-) But at the end of the day is this enough, six months....what have I accomplished? Have I changed lives? Perhaps mine. Made a difference at the West Bromwich YMCA? Sadly I fear that I haven't done any of these things.

But here is a list of things I do feel I have accomplished over the past six months:

Monisha's Top Ten list For the first six months in the UK!

10. Learned how to speak proper English (ok still working on that one)
9. Learned how to ride the bus, train, plane, and everything in between.
8. There is more to England than London. (But London is def pretty cool)
7. How to work with people in a different light, ie different managerial practices, customs, and structures.
6. Some people don't want to be helped, and some just need you to listen. (What a revelation!)
5. A Christmas that was centered around giving to others. (The true spirit?)
4. Was forced to learn independence. Yes I had independence before, but being alone in another country teaches you much more.
3. Had the opportunity to travel to amazing and fascinating places.
2. Gained a better understanding of myself, sometimes I liked what I saw, sometimes I didn't. (More insight and growth).
1. Built warm and strong friendships, that will last forever! (I just know).

The journey is at its half way mark, is it over or has it only just begun? Is the sun setting or rising? Over the next few months, I will continue to think about the possibilities and mysteries that are in store for me. And as frustrating as it can be, I will try to put my best foot forward at the YMCA.

Peace and Cheers!

Hello, Goodbye

When you're so far away from home you learn a lot about freindships, and honestly this is a blog I should have written forever ago. But hey better late than never. I would say the last month has been a bit hard, with the holidays coming and going, missing my friends from home, enjoying the new relationships I am building while being abroad, and saying good bye to some freinds who were along on this journey.

Good Bye
And to be honest saying good bye was one of the hardest things ever, even though its not a good bye forever...it was a good bye to friends who have been my support system here in the UK and in other countries, who due to some unfortunate circumstancse had to return home to the States. Even though I haven't seen some of them since we got on a plane in Chicago, missing them didn't change. Either way, life was easier knowing that they have been there for me, and hopefully I have been there for them too, and this bond is one that will remain unbreakable.

So here is to my mean girls who have helped me on this journey! Hello to the ones who are still out there, and good bye to the ones who have
gone back to the States.








Hello

Now to be honest this journey has been about a lot of goodbyes, but a lot of hellos too! I mean lets be honest, that's what happens when you make a decsion to move across over the pond, or anywhere else for that matter. And another amazing thing that has happend is being able to reunite with old friends here in the UK. I mean its a bit of a shame that it took coming to England or Scotland to finally rekindle old frienships. But its been awesome hanging out with people who knew me since birth almost, or in other cases since middles school, and realizing we still have much in common, and that we can now pursue, what my mom would call an adult frienship.

So here's to Anna and Maita for growing up together, and renewing our friendships!








Hello, Goodbye

And now all those friends at home who have made trips to see me, plan on making trips, sent millions of emails, and of course rang me. The old friends who have now stood the test of time and distance. Thanks! I am not sure I say it enough, but here's to the best mates a girl could ever ask for.
Now of course, I have made some new friends since I have been here too, who are a part of living and working in the UK and West Bromwich, and those relationships are blossoming everyday. So who knows there could be a blog in the future dedicated to all my new mates in the UK. (Only if you're lucky...or should I say unlucky).

Sorry guys this blog was for the ladies. To friends old and new..... cheers :-)

Happy Christmas, Merry New Year...Cheers to 007!

Ok, so I have been a bit of a slacker on the blog. And to be honest I feel like so much has gone on that I dont even know where to begin. Lets see I finally experienced my first proper football match...BOING BOING BAGGIES! In other words I am becoming a dedicated fan to the West Bromwich Albions (after all I am their good luck charm they won that game 5-nil) who are the local team here, a part of the English Chamionship league, and please dont expect me to explain how the football leagues work. This new support for the Baggies has led to a new project for the YMCA - a relationship with the West Bromwich YMCA and the West Bromwhich Albions. This will mean I will use my power of persusion and work on getting the Albions to do some marketing promotions for our Healthy Living Centre. And apparently this afternoon I will have a football traning session with one of the Albion coaches and our male residents(I think they are tying to turn me into a footballer).

Now onto a very Happy Christmas in West Brom. I was ever so lucky to have my wonderful mum come and spend Christmas with me; and honestly it was awesome. It did make me long for home even more having her here, but I couldnt even begin to imagine what life would have been like spending Christmas without family. I do wish that all three of us had been together for Christmas, but hey you live and learn.

This Christmas was very different from any other, and not becuase I wasn't at home in Delaware but because, this year Christmas wasn't about me. My mum and I took the opportunity to give back this holiday sesason, and actually spent Christmas day making a real Christmas dinner for the residents at the YM who were staying here for the holidays. My mum, along with some other staff memembers, and myself cooked a full English Christmas meal down to mince pies and served it to about 10 residents. It really was an awesome experience, and loads of fun. It was nice to be able to share this day of family in a nontradtional way. But I guess I have been doing a lof of that since I have been here. After dinner was all done around 5ish we did our own Christmas which was very simple...and spent the rest of the day making phone calls home, speaking to my Baba (dad), friends, and relatives and of course spending time together.

On Boxing day we woke up bright and early and were off to London to spend some time with relatives, do a bit of sightseeing, and of course some shopping.

Now onto New Years! My New Years was def fun, not what I expected but fun none the less. I went to Edinburgh, Scotland for Hogmanay, which is the largest new years celebration in the UK. Its basically three days of partying, carnival type stuff, and a huge street party on new year's eve, where they expected about 500,000 folks to come in from all over the world. We arrived in lovely Scotland on Saturday night, had a great night, which involved lots of wine and sushi. And then we went to bed a bit early to be ready for NYE.

Needless to say when we woke up it was POURING DOWN RAIN, but no worries its Scotland and the UK after all and that's what it does, it rains. So we made our way outside, around 2ish and we saw a beautiful sun set(yes the sun starts setting by like half 2 because by half 3 its completely dark outside). So we are like no worries, no rain, just windy. We came home and began to pregame, get ready to pop over to our mate Mark's house and head to the party. Well when we arrived at Mark's we found out they had CANCELLED the street party. And we were like what do we do now? So we decided to go to the city centre anyway...well we and thousands of others did the same thing. WE are all loving life, everyone was in a good mood and we went to Rose street which is where there are a ton of pubs, we did some pub hopping, stopping to do a bit of dancing and of course lots and lots of kissing on the cheeks with random blokes. Made some Aussie friends too. And at Midnight we found ourselves with god knows how many others on a street intersection. Well none of us knew what time midnight really was (in our various native time zones) so we all started looking at our watches, counting down at different times, and it was actually quite funny. Until we saw fireworks (now it wasn't as huge as the fireworks display was supposed to be, apparently they have been known to spend millions of pounds on fireworks for NYE). But everyone started popping open champagne, beer, and whatever ever else they could spray on the crowd, I was drenched in alcohol, and it was great! It was an amazing sight. It wasn't as crazy as I heard it was going to be, but hey I got to bring in 2007 in Scotland.

So here is to a great '007! Can you tell I absolutely loved the new James Bond movie and I am now dedicating my whole year in its honour.
May all people be at peace today and each day :-).

"America, a country no older than a heartbeat"

So, since I have been here I have tried to do a bit of traveling, and really understand where I now live, the United Kingdom and a bit of Europe. Now trust me, that is a lot to accomplish in a year's time and on a YAV stipend. But I can at least start to scratch the surface, after all I am trying to have a better understanding of what it means to be part of a global community. And with Secretary General Kofi Annan, putting forth the challenge to the United States to be the leader of the United Nations, and this growing community, its only fair that I do my small share. After all "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country" paraphrasing JFK. Ok so I do have good intentions of becoming a global citizen, but I also just really love to travel and see everything I can. Since its cheaper to travel from England, why not take advantage of this opportunity? Well, my latest travels took me to Rome.

When I first arrived in West Bromwich, one of the women I worked with said to me. I dont really like the States, becuase it doesnt have any culture. I had no idea what she meant by this, of course we have culture, loads of it. And then when I was in Rome I understood. Its not so much culture she was speaking of its history. Yes we have our history but not the kind that spans back way before Christ (or the commonly known error, dependng on who you talk to).

In Rome I was blown away, by the Roman forum, the colliseum, and my favorite Trevi Fountain. I mean these sturctruces had been in existance before the US was even thought of. These cultures, traditions, have roots, that I can never understand, being from a baby of a nation. It's unbelieveable and awe inspiring.

Then this feeling occured all over again when I was walking through the National Gallery in London. I mean there were paitings that I saw which were more than twice as old as the US. Its actually kind of cool if you think about it to walk on streets that have been walked on for thousands of years, that could tell a story, that we may never hear, or only partly hear. It gave me goosebumps and a whole new appreciation for being from such a young nation turned super power. I thought of all those nations that came before us, truly a humbling notion.

So, now we just have to figure out how we can all work and learn together in this modern global community, while preserving, respecting and learning from the past, yet stepping boldly into the future. In the mean time I will continue to enjoy my journey inwads, and travels outwards. Cheers for peace! Chiao!

Make love not war, every cloud has a silver lining, World AIDS Day, just another day at the YM

Well it’s been a while and lots of action going on here at the lovely YMCA of West Bromwich. Where do I even begin? Well first things first, my group of residents, who I have been diligently working with to help empower, teach independence, and all in all try to do some positive self building, sort of blew up in my face. Let’s just say, (tongue in cheek) that this group of about eight residents, learned the lessons well and interpreted them in their own special way. They learned how to support each other, practice loyalty, be independent, and were def feeling empowered….maybe a little too empowered. This group of mainly girls, who were barely friends before, seemed to take the leadership business to heart, and in a way created a very intimidating gang at the YMCA Housing Project, and were being supported innocently enough by none other than yours truly. Oops! I guess next time I should remind them to use their power for good not evil “make love, not war”.

The story starts with an Ice Skating trip. It all seemed innocent enough, the residents came together, planned an activity and off we went. The only problem with Ice Skating is, people can get hurt, and of course one of them did. This created the bond between them, because they were positive that this boy in the pink shirt had pushed one of the female residents, ending in a fun trip for us all in an ambulance. It was like the Domino effect. This happened on Sunday, and things just got worse from there. The team leader of the RAP's (Residents Activities Panel) name popped up everywhere, and was constantly being associated with trouble. Next thing we know fences had been broken, alcohol was being misused (maybe even some pills/drugs), rooms had been trashed, people were arrested, and eventually about eight or so of my great RAP group, had been unceremoniously kicked out.

What was worse, is we had big plans for this group. They were supposed to help with World AIDS Day, bring awareness to the problems in Honduras, work on LPA Qualifications. Where did we go wrong? Did I do that? And then I remembered the word choices. We all make choices, and for some reason they felt powerful, invincible even (empowered oops!?), rules no longer applied to them! And as hard as it was to know that some of the residents who I worked so closely with were sleeping in a phone booth in front of the Y, I knew I had to uphold my supervisor’s position. They really had gone too far. I haven’t had a chance yet to ask them why, but I will. For some reason, they still feel like they can trust me, and speak to me when they see me. And I guess that even if things weren’t quite right, at least I did succeed in building relationships. Will they figure out they brought this on upon themselves? Leadership and bullying are not synonymous.

But all is not lost. Tuesday night RAP was scheduled to meet and Julian and I thought that for sure no one would turn up, but lo and behold there were five fresh new residents ready to plan activities; they were a bit older with different interests, but eager to be involved. Life goes on at the Y.

On World AIDS Day, December 1, 2006 (the residents had been kicked out the night before), the residents were supposed to release balloons, with prayer requests on them. Obviously this couldn’t happen as planned, as they no longer were allowed on YMCA property. I had to be creative and find a solution, this was too important a day not to participate and we had all the materials. Fortunately it dawned on our marketing director that there were many other people who also were a part of the YMCA community, so we involved staff, nursery children, and clients who use the gym. An awesome balloon launch was held outdoors to remember those who are dying or have died, those living with AIDS and those family and friends who are affected by AIDS. So all was not lost. There is a silver lining when you search for one and…..never a dull moment. Cheers!